Being married to football is an awesome life. It's hard, fun and exciting. Here'a little glimpse into my life as a coach's wife. Plus, grab my free Friday Night Lights printable!
This week starts the high school football season here in Florida. I am always excited in August to begin the season. In an effort to express this excitement (since we don't have a game for over 3 weeks) I thought you might enjoy learning a little about this significant piece of my life.
Football is a REALLY big part of our life. I mean a REALLY. BIG. DEAL.
A lot of people are big football fans, but as a coaching family we literally live football. We live football 365 days a year. The phone calls about all kinds of crazy situations never stop, no matter the time of year.
First, some history
Coach (FYI this is my loving name for my hubs) is going in to his third year as a head high school football coach. Prior to that time, he was the defensive coordinator at a very successful program in St. Augustine. The first year as a head coach we like to call "the hardest year of our life" because it was in fact that. It wasn't just related to football, but we really had NO IDEA how different being in charge of a program would be. That year our record was 5-5, a huge improvement for our school who had a combined 5 total wins from the previous 3 years.
The second year, last year, was much more enjoyable, albeit still very challenging. In the first whole year of this new position, I think Coach dealt with every single possible thing that could, and did, go wrong. I always tellย him that he seriously needs to write a book about all the crazy stuff that's happened to us. ย But through all the challenges, our sports team improved and pulled outย a couple of very significant victories for a 6-4 record.
We've decided that the most difficult task of taking over a sports program is culture change. You can't just snap your fingers and change the mindset of athletes. It takes time, challenge, buy-in, support, victory and more. We are getting there for sure but it takes time.
The Struggles of Coaches and Our Game Plan
I think what makes being a coaching family the hardest (for me at least) is theย rigidity it brings to our life in the fall. It's difficult to understand from the outside looking in but I'll try to explain. Being a high school level coach requires long, long days -- about 11-12 hours to be exact. Coach leaves at 6:30am and often is not home till 6:30/7pm. He does that Monday - Thursday. Sunday he works from noon - 6pm-ish and Fridays, as you can guess, put him home somewhere between 11pm and midnight. It probably goes without saying that Coach is exhausted for most of football season.
Our time together as a family (not at a football event) is limited during football. I struggle with this sometimes because it can be lonely. Family dinners, an important family timeย for us, are often just me and the kids about 4-5 days a week. (For the record, one of the reasons I love summer so much is because we are all together for dinner nearly every night.)
We also don't travel in the fall. It's just nearly impossible. Saturday is the only true "off" day. But it's not uncommon for Coach to need to watch film or do something to prepare for the next week.
- If you are getting married out of town in the fall, I'm sorry but we probably we won't be there.
- We would love to go see Florida State play, but it's a lot to drive over just for the day.
- We areย dying to go back to Napa Valley during fall harvest, but it will wait till Coach is retired. Heย has actually promised this trip to me and I can't wait!
- Most importantly, we are booked up every Friday from mid-August to (hopefully) early December.
This is the life of a coach and there's no point in wishing things were different.
The Best Reward and The Calling
Often times, when I tell someone I am a football coach's wife, they either aren't amused or confess their love for the show Friday Night Lights. Well, we are pretty big FNL fans ourselves. The show actually gives a pretty accurate picture of what it's like to be a coaching family, especially the husband-wife dynamic. Watching that show makes me feel a lot more normal.
I'm thankful this show brings to light the impact a coach can have in the life of a young man. This is THE reason I signed up for this life and why I believe in my hubby so much. Not only is he a truly brilliant football coach (and might I add he teaches statistics and physics as well) but he teaches so much more about life and character to our young men.
There are not a lot of avenues left in life that teach young men to have character and integrity. Not many situations give a student athlete the opportunity to practice loyalty and commitment despite difficult circumstances. Few places exist where putting others above yourself is imperative for success.
In our football program (and many others), these are the keys taught for true success.ย This is the life of a coach. Time on the football field is significant and valuable, and at times, even sacred.
Coaching Family
I believe wholeheartedly that it is not just my husband's job as the coach; WE are all a coaching family. We will make the time commitment and participate as much as we can in football to be a significant part of all of the above. Fellow coaches' wives I'm sure will agree, we are committedย to this life because we believe it matters. It can change the future globally, by training up men of character, and individually, by investing in the lives of young men so they know they are important.
For me and our kids, this plays out in many ways. I am always thinking and praying about new ways to participate in football, but here is what it looks like for me:
- Attending practice regularly, at least once every two weeks.
- Having groups of players over to our house for meals.
- Making cookies for the big play-makers of the game, or just the person I think needs encouragement.
- Taking a player out to eat with our family when they are going through hard times.
- Looking our players in the eye the day of prom and telling them to act like gentleman. {That reminds me, sometimes we chaperone prom.}
- Attending basketball, baseball, or track games so our players know they have our unwavering support in whatever sport they play.
- Acting as the "Official Sports Dietitian of the Mustangs", a title I am very proud of.
The Fun
There are SO MANY fun things about being a coaching family. Being around sports is electric. Despite the rigidity of the schedule, the love of the sport keeps us alive and on our toes. We seriously never know what will happen next in this football story of ours. (I'm telling you, one day I will convince Coach to write a book!)
I love that we participate in homecoming festivities, are part of pre-game meals, go to graduation parties and signing day, and have a big banquet at the end of the season. Seriously, I just love that stuff.
The Best People
We also get the opportunity to walk alongside the best people. Between our coaching staff and players' families, we share life with a lot of people. We have been through some really dark times with these folks and certainly many amazing experiences too. Practically, I am thankful that everyone knows who Jacksonย is at our game nights, so if heย goes a-wandering through the stands, I have 50 sets of eyes helping me out. I truly believe our boys LOVE being a part of daddy's program.
Game Day Fashion
On a less serious note, game day fashion is definitely a fun part of football. I desire to bring some SEC class to our games so I like to find dresses, skirts, cute tops, and accessories for games. I'm always on the hunt for cute orange and green clothes so if you find something, send me a message! ย I'm actually going to write a post on some of favorite items in the future, so stay tuned, if you need some ideas too.
Decorating for Football Season
I also love to decorate our house for football season. After all, it is an "event" every year and I want to celebrate it. I think this is a small way to enforce to my psyche and to my boys that what Coach does is good, fun and really important.
This year I made a fun Friday Night Lights inspired sign. Since Coach doesn't really have a phrase quite like this, I borrowed Coach Taylor's favorite line. It's a little tongue-in-cheek and I hope it just makes us smile more than anything. I want to share it with you too. Feel free to download this puppy for your screen saver or to print out. I printed this as a 5x7 and put it in a frame.
I truly appreciate that you have taken the time to read this rather long post on our football life. It means a lot. This is a side of my life that is crucial but doesn't always get talked about.
More From a Coach's Wife
To the fellow coaches wife, please take a gander through my other Married to Football Posts too:
If you know of someone in a coaching family who might be encouraged by this, please pass it on to them. In general, spread the word that youth sports, and most importantly high school coaches, assistant coaches, and their families, are extremely important.
Thank a coach in your life today, especially one at the youth level. They've probably had more of an impact on your life than you realize, or maybe you do.
Viva Football!
Jenna
